Archive for the ‘Everything Else’ Category

The drawing to the left is entitled “She is My Sunshine”.

The artist is Sam Brown out of Denver, Colorado.  I stumbled upon his work at Exploding Dog through a friend a few years ago and fell in love with the art.  The drawings have a simple aesthetic appeal but what I love most about them is their ability to capture very specific emotions.  Each drawing has a little title like, “since when did you have lazer eyes?” or “without you i am completely incomplete”.   One is called “I’d slay a dragon for you” and the drawing says “but why?”. 

So much of emotion is a moment.  You may have a thousand sad or melancholoy moments but each one is a little different; aach happy moment is tender in its own way.  And that’s what resonates with me – many of these quirky pieces of art have a universal appeal to them.  They might be kind of weird but you “get it” for lack of a better phrase.  People can send in ideas for him to draw –

Go forth and explode!  I mean explore…


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The Magnetic Fields

I just heard a song from their new album Distortion on an NPR show called “Fair Game“.   I had a few of their songs before my “infamous” hard drive crash, but had since forgotten them and this peek into their new music was intruiguing.  I really liked the few songs I heard on their myspace page (the only thing myspace is good for anyway…music). 

In other news – we’re still trying to get everything packed up.  I can’t believe how much stuff we’ve accumulated and how hard it can be to throw things away.  Things from my childhood, things from high school, college…it’s not that I am wrapped up in feeling that my life has been defined by material things.  Rather, the boxes of papers, photos, buttons and other odds and ends, somehow bring back all of my memories in a rush that is bittersweet and oh-so-pleasant.  Nostalgia is a melencholy emotion but one that I could never do without and in a strange way love to experience.  (So long as it’s not tinged with TOO much regret.) 

On the other hand, things that once seemed so important are now dismissed and tossed away with barely a glance and a flick of the hand which my husband knows to mean ‘bye-bye’. 

I constantly struggle with the desires to keep and to toss.  To retain and to purge.  It’s almost as if I’m afraif that letting go of those things means to accept losing those memories.  To fully close those chapters of my life, never to open the box again, squeal with joy and tenderly pull out the small momentos that remind me of long lost times and long lost people…is not something I can do easily. 

I think we all long for things past – Fitzgerald may have said it best in This Side of Paradise that we do not wish to regain our innocence.  We wish to lose it again.  I love that book and I love the idea, because going back to my old things gives me a chance to retravel the paths of my life from where I was to where I am. 

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Movies & Moving

Warning – there is a spoiler about Into the Wild

Over the weekend I was able to see Into the Wild and Martian Child.  The former, was a very long and scenically beautiful movie. It had some wonderfully poignant moments when the main character really connects with nature and more importantly with people around him.  The ending scenes, however, as he slowly starves to death, left me a little disturbed and just feeling kind of awful at the end.  I couldn’t figure out why, but I think it has to with the fact that when he finally reaches clarity and finds the “truth” he so desperately seeks, there is no hope.  He’s dying and will never get to employ the lesson.  Does he regret it or does he feel that without the final journey into death, his lesson about happiness would have remained unlearned?  Was it worth it to him?  I can’t say – but the seeming futility of his final days really left me feeling a but empty, instead of inspired by the “truth” he learned.  I ended up thinking primarily on his death rather than exploring the other 2 hours of film where you could really think about how pure his relationships were with the people he met when things weren’t founded on things and life wasn’t spent interrupted by cell phones and stop lights.  But I think that is a bit just me – I have a hard time to imagining myself in the situation of characters and the ending scenes were perhaps jut a little too intense for my psyche to handle?  Overall, I loved the soundtrack, loved seeing his travels, the life of a vagadond, and the people he met, but the psychological ramifications of going through the end of life as he did left me feeling a little hollow inside.

Martian Child was a movie that I enjoyed.  I like John Cusack in general, but I thought the movie was a nice “feel-good” film.  Yes, it’s fairly predictable with moments where I had to remind myself that it was a movie, and wraps up tidily – but I still enjoyed it.  It did a good job of not giving you characters you saw a good or bad – while sometimes you were frustrated with the adoption board, the boy, John Cusack, it was only in the mild way you would feel for someone you care for and believe to have good intentions.  And you know what?  There is nothing wrong with enjoying a good, clean, film with a happy ending. 

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Mr Pitiful by Matt Costa

It begins with an infectious, circus-like few bars that and turns into an all out infectious, original sounding tune.  It’s one of those songs that gets stuck in your head and whether you know it or not, you’re bouncing along by the end.  His music, from what I’ve heard, has this great southern twang and jazzy feel all the while still paying homage to the indie.

Check it out on his MySpace – http://www.myspace.com/mattcostamusic

His voice reminds me of someone else, but I can’t think who. Any ideas?

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Snow & Stories

Well we had quite a surprise little storm yesterday.  It was supposed to be a quick moving but it ended up staying all afternoon and evening.  Some areas got 24 inches of snow – still waiting to see what the ski resorts got.

So – story time. 

#1)  I suck.

Last night, after work, I drove to a class.  The roads and traffic were terrible and it took me almost an hour for a 20 minute drive.  Get out of the car – left my keys in the ignition.  So stupid.  So I called my husband to tell him he’d have to come get me when my class ended at 7.  Get up to class…late…and everyone is standing around…no teacher…no email about cancellation…no answer on his phone.  So after 20 minutes I called my husband again to tell him to come get me.  Did I mention our second car has an expired registration and we need to go this weekend to get it inspected?  So he comes out, 45 minutes later, we both drive another 40 minutes home and get back about 8.  What a crummy way to end a day.  Boy did I feel stupid. 

#2)  True Love?

So – I got married the summer of 2006.  neither of us are really big Valentine’s Day people and I don’t think we did anything last year.  I managed to buy a card at lunch time I think.  So today, I wished the husband a perfuctory Happy Valentine’s Day.  His response was, “Hmph.  I think I love you a little less today than all the other days in the year just because it’s Valentines.”  I had to laugh because I totally know what he means. 

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Wow.  I’ve been so busy this past week or two – I practically forgot I had a blog!  We’ve been having snowstorms just about every other day, but this weekend is finally going to warm up.  We’re going to look at a house we saw For Sale by Owner and if we like it, we might talk to a mortgage lender.  I’m terrified at the prospect of making such a large purchase – all sorts of doubts and what-ifs…  Anyone else bought a home? 

How did you know it was a good choice?  Did you ever have regrets afterward – wish yuo bought a larger, smaller, more expensive, less expensive, or another home you might have seen?  We’re still only “browsing” since we live in an effing cheap apartment, but we are tripping all over eachother in our one bedroom place!

Also, next time I hope to get a review of Juno on here.  Here’s a sneak peak:  Love it!!!

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When I was growing up, my mother always told me that I could do anything I wanted if I tried hard enough.  I took that very literally.  I grew up quite a little perfectionist, always thinking 10 steps ahead, and always feeling that the only reason not to be good at something was lack of effort and laziness on my part.

Now I’m older.  Not a lot, but some, and I still have the problem of wanting to “do it all”.  I want to run a marathon, I want to ride in the LOTOJA bike race, I want to make quilts, knit, buy a home, go back to school, read a book a week, stay up on new music and media, travel the world, learn to cook, keep a clean house, keep a journal, and be a good person.  (Among other things…) 

Focusing and relaxing.  Both things that I need to work on personally and professionally.  I’m always getting worked up and overwhelmed by life and job stress.  What I need to do is focus all that negative energy on changing what can be changed instead of wasting all my time worrying.  Pick a few things, not 15.  I’m going to do LOTOJA this year, but a marathon will have to wait.  More immediately, I am going to do this stack of files, and that other stack will just have to wait when I can focus and be efficient when working on them.

It’s a lesson I’m trying to learn, but you really can do it all – you just can’t do it all at once. 

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